Emma's Backstory

With Mother's Day coming up this Sunday, I wanted to take a few moments to write "Emma's Backstory"--or, at least, what I am calling her backstory!  There are some more personal details in this, but I believe that they show how God is always working, even (and especially) when we can't see His plan.

Last summer, after losing both babies' adoptions, I had surgery that we hoped would help us conceive.  My doctor was very optimistic about the results and told us that, statistically, the highest chance of conception after a surgery like mine was in the first 6 months.  For the first two months after the surgery, we did unmedicated IUIs.  The sadness I felt in December, which was the sixth month after my surgery, was so heavy.  Often, our infertility is still very hard for me, and we had been very hopeful that this surgery may have given us an opportunity to grow our family through pregnancy. 

After New Year's, David & I began praying more earnestly about how God would have us grow our family.  At that point, we had been waiting with Adoption Network for exactly a year.   Adoption Network didn't have statistics on what the average wait for consecutive adoptions is, but they did tell us that it would be significantly longer than their average wait time of 4 months for first adoptions.  In January, we called our adoption counselor and asked her what we could do to possibly get a match more quickly.  She offered several solutions.  We talked and prayed through them--some were easy, obvious choices to us and others were difficult.  We ended up changing a few things on our profile at Adoption Network, but we also prayed that God would show us other ways that we could grow our family, since we had no idea when we'd receive a match from Adoption Network.

In January, a lady at my parent's church contacted my mom about two brothers, ages 3 & 5, who were just being released from the foster system and were available for adoption.  This lady knew our story and wondered if we might be interested in adopting them.  My mom wisely talked to David about this situation without telling me about it--she wanted Dave to handle this how he best thought.  One night, I was telling David all about my friend Amanda's adoption of Brody from Ukraine.  Up until that time, we had never envisioned ourselves adopting an older child or sibling group.  Dave interrupted my story about Brody and asked if I had talked to my mom.  All of a sudden, I knew that he was about to say something BIG....he started to tell me about these two boys and I just started sobbing.  We talked about this possibility for a long time that night and both loved the idea!

The next morning, David called the boys' case worker.  We thought we would be eligible to apply for adoption of these boys since our home study was current.  The caseworker explained that we needed to be licensed as foster parents to adopt from the foster system.  We asked if there was any way we could complete the 30 hours of training necessary to be licensed.  The case worker was very sweet and said that we could try, but that the boys would likely be placed by the time we could realistically finish the 30 hours.

Even though we were disappointed that these brothers were out of reach for us, we wondered if this was God's way of opening our hearts to adopting a sibling group out of the foster system.  We contacted two local agencies that work with children in the foster system and began praying specifically about this option.

At the same time, we felt like we should go back to our fertility doctor.  We hadn't been back to see him since the winter of 2008/2009, but we wanted to discuss the surgery I'd had last summer and see what he thought of our options.  Given my age and several other variables, he gave us a great percentage for a successful IVF, which is one fertility option we hadn't previously done.  We had never before felt that God was leading us to do an IVF cycle; but, after meeting with our fertility doctor, we began to feel more open to it.  We'd always had some ethical questions about IVF, so we ordered this book.  David and I both read it in a weekend and together felt like we could do an IVF cycle that would not compromise our beliefs.

We prayed and prayed...God, should we begin training to be foster parents?  God, should we pursue IVF?  Both seemed hard, for very different reasons, and we knew that we couldn't move ahead with either one until God gave us both direction. 

A verse that I clung to and prayed over many days during this time was "Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, 'This is the way; walk in it.' " (Isaiah 30:21).  I can't explain how sad, and at times, frustrated, I was that God wasn't answering our prayer.  I felt like I was slowly surrendering my idea of what my family would look like and how it would grow...both David and I were ready, with open hearts, to move to the right or to the left with whatever God showed us.  But, we didn't feel like God was showing us anything.  Night after night, we'd talk about this...and all either of us could say was, "I just sense that God is saying 'wait'." 

Of course, we had no idea that a beautiful birthmother, L, was deciding to place her baby for adoption.  At one of L's prenatal appointments, she talked about her adoption plan with her OB.  L's doctor told her that his daughter and son-in-law were infertile & asked if she would consider placing her baby girl with them.  L was very open to this, since she really respected her doctor and later told me she would loved the idea of placing her daughter with this couple.  The OB told L that he would bring his daughter's adoption profile to the office with him the next day and that she should call his nurse to get it.  L called her OB's nurse the next day and explained the situation.  Apparently the nurse looked everywhere and couldn't find the paperwork that was supposed to be there.  At her next appointment, L's OB asked if she had changed her mind on adoption.  She said no, and then he asked why she had never called to pick up his daughter's profile.  L told him that she had, and that the nurse had said couldn't find it.  He said it had been sitting on the nurse's desk ever since that morning.  In the meantime, L had found Adoption Network in the yellow pages.  She called and said that her only specification was for her daughter to be raised in a Christian family.  Adoption Network has many Christian families waiting for babies, but through God's providence, our profile was one of only six that they sent to L.  She chose us...and you know the rest of the story.

I am confident that the months we spent waiting were not wasted.  They definitely weren't what I envisioned, and there were many days that I cried for the babies whose adoptions we lost and cried that my surgery didn't have the result we'd hoped for...but God has used that time to show me that He will show David and I the way to walk--even when we have no idea where He is leading us.  We were convinced God was going to show us to begin training to adopt from the foster system or pursue IVF, but He didn't.  However, these opportunities were not wasted, and we believe God may use either of these options to grow our family in the future.  But for today, my heart is full with the realization that my God is faithful!  Even when we couldn't see an answer, He was still working.  And, His answer was beautiful!

On this Mother's Day weekend, I echo the words of Psalm 113:9:

"He settles the childless woman in her home,

as a happy mother of children.

Praise the Lord!"

"What God wants for you is never less than anything you have wanted.

You'll never come up short. And when He answers, in His time and in His way,

it will be richer, deeper, and far more meaningful."

~Anne Graham Lotz

Goodbye for Now

We are so grateful for all the love & support we've received over the last few weeks as my Grandpa Ken was very sick.  He was admitted to Harris Methodist on August 12 and moved to a nursing home (Bishop Davies) nearly a week later.  Not too long after being admitted to Bishop Davies, he started receiving hospice care.  All of his immediate family were with him in his final weeks.  My aunt, uncle, and cousins all made 2 flights down from Minnesota in the past few weeks.  It was very bittersweet having our entire family together during this time.  There were plenty of laughs as we remembered funny stories and memories...but also lots of tears as we knew that we would soon be saying "goodbye" to my Grandpa Ken, who passed away this last Saturday, September 4.  Through all our tears and sadness, though, is an incredible peace knowing that this wasn't truly "goodbye."  I am so thankful that my grandfather was a believer and is now in heaven with Jesus.

My sister snapped this picture one night while we were all visiting my grandpa in hospice.  Up until nearly the very end, my grandpa loved bouncing Isaac on his knee and playing with him.  My grandpa absolutely thought the world of Isaac!  Every time I visited him in the hospital and at hospice without Isaac (which was very rare), Grandpa's first question was "How's my boy?"  He also called Isaac "my little rascal."  I'm so glad that my grandpa had nearly a year to know Isaac; though Isaac won't remember his Great-Grandpa Ken, we have lots of pictures to show him someday.

It's still hard for me to believe that my grandpa is no longer here.  Just the other night, Dave & I were talking about how fun this Halloween will be with Isaac!  I told Dave that I couldn't wait to show up on Grandpa & Grandma's doorstep with Isaac for trick or treating....then I paused and realized we won't be able to do that after all.  Though there will be sad days ahead, I'm thankful for all the good times we had with Grandpa Ken. 

Isaac & Landrie's Gotcha Day Party!

For several weeks months, Corrie & I have been dreaming of a GOTCHA Day party to celebrate both Isaac & Landrie!  Isaac's adoption was finalized on Monday, April 26 in San Antonio, and Landrie's was finalized just one day later in Wichita Falls!  Our stories have been woven together so closely that we thought it would be extra-special to close out this part of our journeys with a joint party celebrating the finalization of both adoptions!

Corrie & I became dear friends as we struggled through infertility.  The two primary people God used in my life to change my heart toward adoption were Dave and Corrie.  I always used to hope that I could be pregnant at the same time as one of my close friends...and when we decided to adopt, I just figured that was something I would never get to experience.  But, God exceeded that hope by giving me Corrie!  (Isn't that just like Him?)  Dave & I are so thrilled to have shared our adoption experience alongside the Longs!  

Corrie wrote an adorable poem that we included on the Evite for the party:

  The Longs and Rinn are longtime friends

Each thought the waiting would never end

Last winter both couples chose adoption

Everyone was ecstatic about this option!

In September, Landrie joined the Long family

One month later, Isaac added to the Rinn family tree

These babies have brought us all so much joy

Let's celebrate the GOTCHA Days of this sweet girl & boy!

As Corrie so wisely pointed out, this party wasn't just about the finalizations of both adoptions...it was also to celebrate the end of this part of our journey.  For a long time, we were heartbroken about not having a baby in our arms...and though we still dream of larger families, this party was all about celebrating what God has done for us in ending our pain for a baby and placing these beautiful babies into our families!

This is a shot from Isaac & Landrie's "photo shoot" on Friday morning in their adorable outfits!  I honestly squealed when I first saw them!  Corrie's talented sisters-in-law sewed and embroidered them!

We had our party on Saturday at the pavilion at the Keller Sports Park.  There was a playground right next to the pavilion, and it was full of all the kiddos who came!

Both sets of Isaac's grandparents were able to be at the GOTCHA Day party, which was really special!

Landrie & Isaac with their proud parents!

Summer is such a busy time, but we are so happy that so many people were able to celebrate with us!  All of our guests loved, supported, and prayed for us during some of the tough parts of our infertility and adoption journeys.  We couldn't be more grateful for our amazing families & friends!  And, we especially couldn't be more grateful to our God....who is faithful & works all things for the good of those who love Him!

Mother's Day 2010

My heart couldn't have been more full this Mother's Day...it was my fourth Mother's Day, but the first with a baby in my arms.  For the past few years, Mother's Day has been one of the most difficult days of the year.  My heart ached to have a baby to hold....and Mother's Day was such a poignant reminder of what I didn't have in my arms.  In the past, Dave had always been so thoughtful to plan special getaways on Mother's Day weekend to take my mind off our infertility.  Last Mother's Day weekend, we had just been matched with Isaac's birthmother, so it was an especially sweet Mother's Day.  But, even that was nothing compared to having this precious baby in my arms this Mother's Day!

  On Sunday morning at church, our pastor, Brandon, prayed an incredible Mother's Day prayer.  He prayed for moms whose hearts rejoice on Mother's Day....for moms whose hearts are breaking because their children aren't following the Lord....and for women whose hearts are breaking because they desperately want a baby.  Dave & I were sitting next to our dear friends Mark & Corrie, & I think Corrie & I used half a box of Kleenex just during Brandon's prayer.  It was such a reminder of the pain I had felt so deeply that has now been replaced with such joy....but also a reminder that Mother's Day is still difficult day for many women, regardless of their circumstance.
I couldn't be more grateful for the gift of Isaac...Isaac is proof that God does make beauty from our ashes (Isaiah 61:3)!

Isaac's Gotcha Day!

It's hard to believe that Isaac has already been a part of our family long enough to have his GOTCHA DAY!  But, when we look back at the past year or so, it's amazing how quickly everything happened.  The truth behind that is that God perfectly orchestrated every single one of these events in order to bring Isaac into our family...and we couldn't be more thankful. 

• On April 3, our profile went live on Adoption Network's website!
• On April 4 and April 10, we surprised our parents with the news that we were adopting!  
• On April 8, we received a call from Adoption Network that a birthmother had chosen us (less than a week of being on the website!).  We endured a heart-wrenching 24 hours before we decided that we weren't the right family for this baby.  This was a very difficult decision to make, but we didn't feel any peace about it.  As a sidenote, we found out one month later that this birthmother ended up backing out of her adoption plan and chose to parent her baby.  We realized that God had led us to the right decision and kept us from much heartbreak (though we also didn't know what heartbreak was ahead of us).
• On the evening of Thursday, May 7, we received another call from Adoption Network that we had been chosen by another birthmother.  Ever since the April 8 call, we had been praying that God would give us a very clear sense as to whether or not we would accept a placement.  Before we hung up the phone that night, we both knew that this was the baby for us!  (This also made for a very joyful Mother's Day weekend!)
• On Friday, May 8, we accepted this placement!  Baby Rinn was officially on the way!
• On Tuesday, May 12, we spoke with our birthparents for the first time on a conference call.
• On June 6, we drove down to Waco where we met our birthparents for dinner. 
• On June 10, I went to an ultraound appointment with our birthmother where we found out that Baby Rinn was a boy! 
• On October 16, 2009, Baby Rinn was born!  David & I were able to hold him about an hour after delivery.  The next two days were completely blissful as we cared for Isaac while he was in the NICU. 
• On October 18, 2009, minutes before our birthparents were supposed to sign their relinquishments, they changed their minds.  This was definitely the worst day of our life.  After spending one more hour with Isaac, we drove back home with an empty carseat and broken hearts.  It was absolutely devastating. 
• On October 31, 2009, our birthparents changed their minds about parenting and chose to give Isaac back to us.  It was definitely the greatest day EVER! 
• And today--April 26, 2010--was Isaac's Gotcha Day!  His name has been officially changed from his birth name to Isaac David Rinn.  We couldn't be more thrilled! 

What a special day for our family!  Isaac's adoption was finalized at the Bexar County Courthouse in San Antonio.  We headed down to San Antonio yesterday afternoon along with my mom (a.k.a.: Grandma Missy).  :)  Our lawyer was Melissa Hines, and she did a great job of putting us at ease and also making sure everything went smoothly. 

This court starts the day with uncontested cases, since they usually go so quickly.  Since Isaac's finalization was uncontested, ours was the second case that was heard. 

Once we were called to the bench, we were sworn in by Judge Renee McElhaney.  Melissa began asking Dave & me a series of questions regarding Isaac and our placement.  I cried through most of them, especially when she asked,  "Do you understand that, after this date, this adoption is permanent and cannot be changed?" 

After the questioning, Judge McElhaney cooed with Isaac for a few moments before signing his Decree of Adoption!  We took a few pictures before leaving the courtroom, and then we went to the clerk's office with Melissa to have the copies of the Adoption Decree certified. 

We are now able to send in one last round of paperwork in order for Isaac to receive a social security number.  (Up until this point, he has only had a temporary dependent identification number so that we could claim him on our taxes.) 

We are so thankful that Isaac's finalization went smoothly and that his adoption is final.  We have kept up a good relationship with Isaac's birthparents, and we haven't been nervous that anything would happen with Isaac's adoption.  But, it is comforting to know that he is now truly ours on paper and in name, though he has always been ours in our hearts.

Isaac's signed & certified Decree of Adoption

God has brought us through so much through our miscarriage, infertility, and adoption journey...He is faithful! He has taken our pain and turned it into unbelievable joy & happiness! Isaac's "Gotcha Day" is proof that God can and does take our ashes and turn them into beauty.

Thank you, Jesus, for our Isaac!

"Gotcha Day" is Coming Soon!

As if next week could get any busier (we are closing on both houses on Thursday and moving on Friday), we found out that Isaac's finalization is scheduled for Monday at the Bexar County Courthouse in downtown San Antonio!  Of course, we are ecstatic about moving into our new home, but that is nothing compared to having Isaac's adoption finalized! 


The date to finalize an adoption is set once the child is 6 months old & the adoptive parents have met the necessary requirements.  For the past 6 months, we have sent monthly letters & pictures to our birthparents via the San Antonio adoption agency.  We were also required to provide proof to the agency that Isaac was going to the doctor for his regular checkups.  Additionally, our social worker has made 2 visits to our home in the last 6 months to interview us jointly and individually as well as watch us interact with Isaac.  Following his last visit, our social worker sent a report to the adoption agency recommending Isaac's adoption to be finalized.  Needless to say, we are very relieved that all the piles and piles of paperwork are done....but, best of all, it is absolutely wonderful to know that the State of Texas will now officially recognize Isaac as forever ours, too! 

When we leave the courthouse, we will have certified copies of the final decree of adoption!  We will also be able to obtain a new birth certificate for Isaac which will replace his birth name with "Isaac David Rinn" as well as list our names as his parents. 


In adoption circles, the day an adoption is finalized is known as "Gotcha Day!"  We had our own little "Gotcha Day" on October 31 when we brought Isaac home, but we are ecstatic that Isaac's real "Gotcha Day" is coming up so soon! 


(Also....we are so excited that our dear friends Mark & Corrie have the finalization for their daughter Landrie's adoption set for the day after Isaac's!  We have gone through nearly every part of our adoption journeys together...so it just seems fitting that we finalize at the same time, too!)

SOLD...to bidder 425!

Dave & I are so excited about our new home! It has all happened so fast that we're still finding it hard to believe that we actually are moving!  While we were in Florida, we found out that our house sold!  We are closing on our current home on Thursday, April 29 and will be moving on Friday, April 30 and Saturday, May 1.  (Yes, we will be having a "moving party"--help us move and we promise to provide great food!)

Our new home is in a neighborhood only about 3 miles from our current home.  We first saw this home in January when we were out looking at houses with our realtor.  We absolutely loved it (especially Dave!) because it had absolutely every feature we were looking for in a home, it was in the area that we wanted to still live, and it was on a large corner lot.  It had been on the market since October of 2009.  The bank which owned it had repainted the whole house & replaced all the carpet in December.  We kept our eye on it, but we also kept looking at other homes and waited for ours to sell. 

In February, we noticed a small note on realtor.com saying that this house was going to auction in March.  To be honest, we weren't quite sure what to think.  A (very) small part of us thought that we might have a chance at winning it, but we were sure there would be many bidders and that it would probably go for a higher price than we were willing to pay.

 Now, I have seen footage on the Today show of home foreclosure auctions...there always seems to be hundreds & hundreds of people, TV crews everywhere, an auctioneer talking so fast you can't even understand him...and when somebody wins a bid, they jump in the air and cheer!  So, that was pretty much what we I was expecting.  For some reason, Dave had a more realistic idea of what this auction would be like.

The auction was held on the evening of Tuesday, March 16 at a hotel ballroom in Las Colinas. When we arrived an hour early to pre-register, we thought the auction might have been cancelled since the lobby & hallways seemed nearly empty.  (Where were the TV crews, I wondered?)  Since we got pre-registered so quickly, we had nearly an hour before the auction started, so we went on a walk.  By the time we returned, there were a few more people, but not nearly the hundreds I had envisioned.  My parents met us, and the four of us went into the ballroom where the auction was to be held. The auctioneer explained that only six houses would be up for bid that evening, which was why the crowd was so small. 

This house was the second one up for bid, and I think I held my breath for the entire time (which was probably only 45 seconds!).  There were 2 other people bidding on it, & they were both investors.  The bids were going up by $10,000 increments.  One of the investors bid at the $10,000 increment that was near our stopping point; we weren't willing to go another $10,000 higher.  One of the men who worked for the auction company quickly came over to us & asked Dave if he wanted to go up another $10,000, and Dave said no.  Then he asked if Dave would go up $5,000, and again Dave said no.  He finally said how much Dave was willing to go up, and Dave said only $1000.   Because it was such an odd amount (considering that the bids had all been going up by $10,000), the auctioneer stopped and said (to the auction company worker near us), "Did you make up that number, or did he?"  Everyone in the crowd (except for us!) laughed.  Then the auctioneer said to the investor who had made the bid previous to ours,  "You're not really going to let him take it from you for $1,000, are you?"  When the auctioneer said that, I really thought the investor would go higher, but he didn't...so the auctioneer pounded his fist on the podium and yelled, "Sold to bidder 425!"  My eyes filled with tears and Dave & I stared at each other in disbelief!  We couldn't believe it!  Dave's face was so ashen white that I thought he was going to faint.  The amazing thing is that we won the bid at the EXACT amount--to the dollar--that we had decided upon before the auction.

We knew that the bank had the right to accept, reject, or counter our offer.  We were pretty sure that they would most likely counter it, since we had won it at such a low price....but we didn't think they would counter more than $5,000.  Needless to say, we were shocked when we received an e-mail on Wednesday saying that the bank had contered at $25,000 more than our offer!  Yikes! 

Dave & I talked about what to do, we prayed, our families prayed, Dave & I talked some more, and some more, and some more...Dave was convinced that we should not go up any higher.  I begged, pleaded, cried, and tried my best to convince Dave that, yes, we should go up a little higher...I didn't want to lose this house at all.  Dave explained that he wasn't comfortable going any higher due to the higher utilities & property taxes we would have at this house, & I finally agreed that he was right.  He called the auction company back to explain that we wouldn't budge on our offer. 

 

And...I am so glad he refused to go higher, because on Friday we got a call that the bank accepted our initial offer!  I don't think I've ever heard Dave yell so loud!  Since then, we have driven by, walked around, and peeked in the windows of our new home at least half a dozen times.  We couldn't be more excited about this new house!  More than anything, though, we are once again in AWE of God's provision for our family!  This is definitely a story that is going in our miracle book!   

Isaac's Dedication

"Unless the LORD builds the house,
its builders labor in vain." Psalm 127:1

On Sunday, November 29, we dedicated Isaac at our church! It was a memorable Sunday for us in many ways. All of our family members who now live in Texas joined us at Keystone for the service, plus many of our friends attended with us too. Our pastor spoke on the first part of Psalm 127 before praying for the families who were dedicating babies. David & I were again reminded of the awesome responsibility God has given us to train Isaac to know and love Him!During Brandon's dedication prayer, Isaac was smiling so big that Dave & I couldn't help but peek! (I'm sure he was just smiling at all the bright lights in the worship center, but it was still adorable.)One of the songs that we sang in the service was "Oh You Bring" by Hillsong United. The lyrics from this song spoke so strongly to me that morning of what God has brought us through:

"Oh You fill those who are empty
And rescue those in the valley
And through it all You calm my soul
Oh You find me in my weakness
And heal the wounds of my heartache"

I know that we keep saying it over and over, but we are so thankful for God's gift of Isaac to our family!

After the service, we had an open house. We had a blast having friends & family over to celebrate Isaac's dedication!


We're so grateful for everyone who was able to celebrate with us! (Of course, Isaac had no idea what was going on & slept like a champ through his whole party!)

Isaac's Homecoming

Come and listen, all you who fear God;
let me tell you what He has done for me.

I cried out to him with my mouth;
His praise was on my tongue.

but God has surely listened
and heard my voice in prayer.

Praise be to God,
who has not rejected my prayer
or withheld his love from me.
Psalm 66:16-17 & 19-20

Isaac's journey to our family has been filled with some of the deepest valleys and highest mountains we've ever experienced in our lives. Isaac was born on Friday, October 16. We spent the next 48 hours with him in the hospital, and that time with him was absolutely blissful.

Our situation turned tragic on the afternoon of Sunday, October 18 when our birthparents changed their minds & decided to parent the baby. We spent a final hour with Isaac before leaving the hospital with broken hearts. Thankfully, Dave was able to be home with me for the entire next week. Our friends and family overwhelmed us with their love & support and showered us with cards, e-mails, messages, prayers, meals, & even a few game nights in order to try to get us to laugh. We are still in awe of the incredible support we felt during this heartbreaking time.

While we were still in the hospital with Isaac, Dave's parents (Tim & Susie) purchased tickets to come to Texas on October 27 to meet their new grandson. Even when our birthparents changed their minds, Tim & Susie kept their tickets in order to come and support us as we grieved. We planned several fun things to do while they were here...one of which was Canton! This past Saturday (Halloween), my mom, Susie, my friend Jenny, & I left our house at 7 to head to Canton, while Dave & his dad planned on spending the day at Cabela's.

Just a few minutes after we left the house for Canton on Saturday morning, I got a text from our birthmother saying that she had received the card Dave & I had sent her and that she was so glad Dave & I weren't angry at her. (The day after we got home from the hospital, Dave & I wrote a letter to our birthparents saying that we weren't angry at them and that we would always remember both them and their beautiful baby boy.) I didn't respond to the text right away, because I was thinking of what to write back...about an hour later she wrote back asking if I was upset with her. I immediately texted back to say that I wasn't upset and that Dave & I were still thinking of her & the baby all the time. Right when we pulled into Canton, she sent back THE text of a lifetime saying that she had already contacted Shelley, the social worker at our San Antonio agency, because she wanted to meet us in Austin with the baby for good.

Even after reading that, I tried not to get my hopes up. Our birthmother had asked if we wanted the baby the previous week, but she and the birthfather ended up keeping him at that time, too. I didn't want either my mom or Dave's mom to get their hopes up, either...so I showed the text to my friend Jenny, who started sobbing in the backseat of my mom's Tahoe. I glared at her to stop crying, since I didn't want the moms to figure out what was going on. (Our parents have hurt for us so much through this whole process...so it's not that I was trying to keep this from our moms--it's just that I didn't want their hopes crushed again.) I texted her back to say that she needed to talk with the social worker about this, but that we would LOVE LOVE LOVE to still have the baby!

I ducked behind a display of clothes at a booth in Canton to call Dave & let him know what was happening. He & his dad were at Cabela's, but were about to head to lunch. Instead, they left Cabela's and went home, because Dave was starting to feel very hopeful about what could happen....so hopeful that he reinstalled the carseat and packed all of Isaac's bags back into the Tahoe before he & his dad left for lunch.

My mom, Dave's mom, Jenny, & I spent the next few hours trekking through Canton...every few minutes I wandered off by myself to talk with our birthmom, Shelley, and Dave. At 11:00 a.m., the four of us were eating lunch when Shelley called me to say that she & Justin (the director of the San Antonio adoption agency) were leaving to drive to Austin to meet our birthparents and have them sign the paperwork. At this point, there was no way I could keep the news from my mom & Dave's mom any longer...Jenny was about to burst, and I was finally starting to believe that maybe this could be for real this time. I started to say, "Mom, I have to tell you something, and it's a good thing you are sitting down..." Of course, both of our moms instantly knew that it had to be about the baby. My mom laid her head down on the table & started sobbing while both Dave's mom & Jenny began praying aloud. After praying and talking about the whole situation for a few more minutes, we started heading for our car...all of us on our cell phones and all of us in a daze!

We started heading back toward DFW on I20 when our birthmom texted me to say that all of her family & the birthfather's family were at their house to say goodbye to the baby. I called Dave to let him know, but he had also just gotten off the phone with our birthmom. I think it is incredibly special that she called Dave to make sure that he still wanted this baby just as much as I did....and, of course, HE DID! Dave & his dad were eating lunch at this time, but they left the restaurant and started heading down 35 toward Austin. Meanwhile, my dad drove down to I20 to meet my mom, Susie, and me...he joined us in our car while Jenny took my dad's truck back to Keller. For the entire trip, Dave and his dad were about 60 miles ahead of the rest of us.

Shelley told me that she would call or text me & Dave when the birthparents signed the paperwork. Around 2:45, I was starting to get nervous, because I knew that Shelley & Justin should have already met our birthparents.Right around 3:00, Dave called our car to say that BOTH BIRTHPARENTS HAD SIGNED THEIR PAPERWORK AND ISAAC WAS OURS!! To say that our car was full of tears, screaming, and cheering is an understatement!!!

Our birthfather's truck got a flat tire on their way to meet Shelley & Justin, and so they had all met at a Discount Tire in Georgetown so their tire could be fixed while they reviewed and signed the paperwork. Our birthparents left about 15 minutes before Dave & his dad arrived, and Shelley & Justin waited with Isaac for Dave to pick him up! At 4:00 p.m., Dave & his dad met Shelley, Justin, and Isaac in the parking lot.

Since our car wasn't near Georgetown yet, Dave fed Isaac a quick bottle, and then Dave & his dad started heading back north on 35.
My dad pulled off the interstate at exit 275, and since our car got there first, my parents, Dave's mom, and I were all waiting on the access road for Dave, Dave's dad, and Isaac. I don't think Dave had even put the Tahoe in park before I jumped in the backseat to see my Isaac again. All of the grandparents were crowding in through the doors to see their grandson, and my sister was on speakerphone so she could experience the moment as best as she could from Chicago.

We spent the next half hour in the parking lot passing Isaac around. It was unbelievably memorable that all of Isaac's grandparents were there to meet him!
After lots of hugs, kisses, tears, and pictures, we all circled around Isaac to pray over him before we headed back toward DFW.

The night after we got home from the hospital without Isaac, many of our close friends came over to pray over us & our home. Many of those same friends came back this past Saturday night...but this time, it was not for tears of sadness and confusion, but for a great celebration! Our family & friends spent the rest of the night passing Isaac around & retelling the story over and over in absolute awe of what God had done for us!


There have been countless times in our lives when we could very clearly see God at work...but this is a time when we both can say without a doubt that we have witnessed a MIRACLE. After we left the hospital without Isaac, we had continually prayed that God would be Isaac's mighty warrior...fighting FOR him & protecting his life. Even when we were completely convinced that we would never see Isaac again, much less have him in our family, God was doing an incredible work....our ram was on the way!

And, while this is a time of great joy for our family, we also recognize that our joy comes at a huge sacrifice of both our birthparents & their extended families. They cared for and loved this beautiful baby boy for nearly 2 weeks, and we can't imagine the sadness and loss they feel at placing him after that time of bonding. Please keep both our birthparents & their families in your prayers as they work to heal & move on from their loss.

We are beyond humbled for all the people who have been praying for us...many of whom we don't even know. We are blessed by your support & love beyond measure...and we can't wait for all of you to meet our amazing miracle, Isaac David!

Introducing...Isaac David Rinn !!!

God Has Provided!

Bethany and I praise God that this morning our birthmother and father changed their minds for the final time and decided to place baby Isaac with us. It was a tearful, joy-filled, and very crazy day that ended in celebration as we headed home from Georgetown (north of Austin) with Isaac. Both sets of grandparents were present and it couldn't have worked out more perfectly. Bethany is preparing our blog post of the century for tomorrow to relay the entire story to all of you who have been on this journey with us hoping and praying for a miracle from God. Until then, I'll try to pacify you with a few pictures from our time with Isaac. Thank you all again for you love and support through it all. It has meant the world to us through a very difficult time.

Our last update on Isaac for now....

This evening we talked to one of the ladies at our Texas adoption agency. She had just received a text from our birthfather saying that he & our birthmom had made a final decision to keep the baby. Even though this is heartwrenching for us to hear (again), there is relief in having a completely closed door. It has been very hard to have this whole situation hang in the balance, as it has been since last Thursday.

Last spring, we decided to adopt because God showed us that we were to grow our family through adoption. Even though this entire experience has been (and continues to be) very difficult, we still desire to adopt a baby into our family. We know that we will never be able to replace the love we had for this baby, and we know that our next baby will be a completely new child to love.

Our profile, which prospective birthmoms are able to view, will go live online tomorrow morning. Of course, there is no guarantee as to when we will be picked...but we find comfort in knowing that God already knows when we will receive a call about another baby.

We are still asking you to pray for blessing on the lives of Isaac & our birthparents and for continued peace & healing in our lives.

To our precious family and friends...

We wanted to share the story of what occurred at the hospital this past weekend, but please understand that our point in writing this is for you to better understand our hearts & know how to best pray for us and this baby boy. We know that our Heavenly Father, who loves this baby far more than even we do, has always held him in His care even before, during and after He graciously allowed us to hold him for a while. We named him Isaac David, and though we don't know if he has been renamed or not, God knows whom you are praying for when you lift this baby boy up to God. We also want you to know that this is not the whole story. Even while everything was unraveling at the hospital, we felt a strong sense that God is not finished with our journey yet. To be sure, the first part is heartwrenching...but we are believing God to finish this story in a mighty way.

Our birthmom called a little before 6:00 on Friday morning to say that she was headed to the hospital. I (Bethany) refused to let myself be disappointed that it might not be true labor, so I headed over to the consignment sale that I had planned on working at that morning. Around 7:45, our birthfather called to say that she had been admitted & was already at a 6! After lots of quick hugs & tears with my friends at the sale, I quickly drove home & began packing up the rest of our bags. Dave remembers me frantically calling multiple times on his way home- even once just to say, "Are you sure we remembered everything?... wait, I need to FLOSS!" before hanging up on him without him even getting a word in!

Dave made it home from his jobsite in Jacksboro around 9:45. We prayed for our birthparents and a safe delivery before pulling out of the driveway, and then we began a very quick trip down 35 to Temple! Our drive down was filled with lots of phone calls, and I also tried reading aloud to Dave from one of our books about caring for newborns. ;)

We made it to the hospital right before 1:00 in the afternoon, and our birthfather couldn't have been better about keeping us up to date with the progress of the delivery. After 4 quick pushes, the baby was born at 1:28 on Friday afternoon!

We were able to meet him about an hour after he was born, and there really are no words to describe that moment. He was beyond beautiful--7 lbs., 8 oz. and 18 inches long. The first thing we both noticed about him was his beautiful blond hair! We were able to spend quite awhile with our birthparents & the baby before they moved him to the NICU and our birthmother checked herself out of the hospital and headed home. The hospital's census was very high, so they didn't have a room to give us in the hospital; and, since this hospital doesn't have a well baby nursery, they put the baby in the NICU nursery. It actually worked out wonderfully, because we were able to spend as much time as we wanted with him in the NICU...and, the NICU nurses were absolutely fabulous and gave him a lot of extra attention! (When some of our friends & family heard that the baby was staying in the NICU, they were worried about his health...but he was only in there because it is the only nursery at this hospital.) Due to the swine flu, each baby is only allowed to have the same 2 people visitors while in the hospital. My (Bethany) parents had driven down on Friday evening, and since they weren't able to meet the baby in the hospital, they spent all their time in Temple bringing meals to us in the waiting room whenever we left the NICU. Late on Friday evening, Dave used his best persuasion skills to convince the nurses to let him step out into the hallway outside the NICU and hold the baby, and my parents peeked in through a window at the end of that hallway to see him.

We spent the rest of the day on Friday, all day Saturday, and most of Sunday loving on this beautiful baby boy. The love we felt for him was more intense than either of us could have imagined, & there were many, many tears of joy & thankfulness shed over him during those 48 hours. We briefly talked with our birthmom a few times over the waiting period and, each time, she still sounded confident in her decision to place the baby with us.

We met with 2 representatives from our Texas adoption agency at 11:30 on Sunday morning to sign all our paperwork. They were then headed to meet our birthparents at a nearby restaurant at 12:30 to review all their paperwork in order for our birthmother to sign her relinquishment at 1:30 p.m. At 12:25 p.m., I talked with our birthmother briefly on the phone, and she said that she couldn't talk for long because they were headed to the restaurant. The agency represntatives had promised us that they would call or text us as soon as the relinquishment was signed. At 1:45, I was starting to get nervous that they hadn't called yet, but I wasn't too upset, since throughout our entire placement, our birthmother has made continual comments about how she would never back out. We were also confident that she would sign (as were our adoption agents) since she spent so little time at the hospital and had gone home on Friday evening without even visiting the baby before she left.

At 1:50, Dave's phone started to ring, so he quickly left the NICU and stood in the hallway to take the call. I was holding the baby & watching through the window into the hallway when I saw his face go white. I quickly put the baby down in his bassinet & ran into the hallway, where Dave told me that it was the adoption agency on the phone saying that the birthparents had never showed up at the restaurant and had instead gone to Wal-Mart to buy a carseat for the baby. At the same time, the charge nurse walked up & said that a hospital social worker was on the way. We asked her why, & she said that the birthmother had just called & said that she was coming to get the baby. At that moment, our world was turned upside down. I remember falling on the ground and sobbing out to God...Dave was still on the phone with the adoption agency...and the baby's nurse ran out into the hallway and was suddently on the floor with me. She was holding me as I sobbed and told me that she was an adoptive mother too.

The represntatives from our Texas agency quickly came back to the hospital. With tear-stained faces, they told us that they were just as shell-shocked as we were. The four of us spent the next 2 hours in a conference room making tons of phone calls. Adoption Network, the group in California who matched us with our birthmom in May, was furiously trying to get ahold of our birthmom, too. Throughout the next few hours, our adoption agents found out that it was actually our birthfather who felt he couldn't give up the baby; and, because of that, our birthmom was refusing to sign. No words can adequately describe the overwhelming emotions that we felt at that time. We called our parents and a few friends intermittently, and we know that there were hundreds of people calling out to God on our behalf during that time.

Around 5:00, our agents heard from our birthmom one last time, and she said that she and the baby's father were coming to get the baby that evening. We spent one final hour crying & praying over the baby before we left the hospital. We have never been asked to do anything harder than to walk away from that perfectly beautiful baby that we had grown to love so quickly in 2 days.

We sat in the hospital parking lot for awhile & called our parents, who were all weeping right along with us. During those terrible hours of waiting to find out what was going to happen, God reminded Dave of the story of Abraham & Isaac. As Abraham was walking up the mountain to sacrifice, Isaac asked, "Where is the lamb for the burnt offering?" Abraham replied, "God Himself will provide." Another of our dear friends put it this way: That even while Abraham and Isaac were walking up one side of the mountain, God's provision (the ram) was walking up the other side. We believe God Himself will provide for us.

We don't know if He's going to provide us with this baby by allowing our birthparents to change their minds again...we don't know if He will provide another baby for us...or maybe God's provision will come in a way that we can't even imagine at this point.

We know that many of you are hurting and crying right along with us. Specifically, we would love for you to pray for these things....

~Continuing our prayer since placement that he grows to have a heart after God's own
~Thanking God for answering our prayers for a healthy baby boy
~For safety, protection, and blessing over this baby's life as he grows
~For graciousness and forgiveness toward our birthparents
~That God would strengthen our marriage through this trial
~That Satan's lies would have no foothold in our lives or our home
~That God would answer our prayer to have children in our home in His time and for our patience through that process

We love you all and are EVER grateful for your prayers and support through this difficult time for us.
David & Bethany

By God's unfailing love, To Be Continued...

Our *big* news!

To our sweet family & friends:

We are so excited to share with you our big news that we are adopting a baby! Many of you know that we have struggled to grow our family for several years now. Our journey of infertility has been extremely difficult, but even through our darkest times, we clung to the promise from God's Word in Romans 8:28 that "all things work together for good for those who love God!" We are so excited to say that the best thing that has come from our journey is our joy & excitement at welcoming a precious little baby into our family through adoption!

We are working with a law center that specializes in placing domestic infants for adoption. Our past few months have been filled with more paperwork than we could ever imagine, completing our adoption homestudy, and preparing the nursery for little Rinn. In addition to all of this, Dave has kept busy building a gorgeous crib!

A prospective birthmother is able to view information on waiting families and choose which family she wants to raise her child. As excited as we are for the phone to ring with a call that we have been chosen, we have already discovered that this part of the journey is not easy, either. On Wednesday night, we received a call that a birthmother had selected us. After a tough 24 hours of reviewing all the information on the birth family, praying, and talking, we made the very difficult choice that we were not the right family for this baby. This experience has opened our eyes even more as to how much we need this entire process bathed in prayer.

Specifically, we ask you to pray for the following things:
**for the health & safety of our birthmother & baby
**for the families of the birthmother & birthfather to be supportive of their plans to place the baby for adoption
**for us to have wisdom in making a decision when another call comes
**for the details of the adoption--legal paperwork & potential travel out of state--to work out smoothly
**for our hearts to be patient & hopeful during this time of waiting

So many of you have supported and prayed for us through some very rough times, and we can't tell you enough how grateful we are for those prayers. We continue to ask for your prayers as we wait for little Rinn!