Wordless Wednesday

 

sometimes, the simple things...

...are the best things!

A 48 cent bag of split peas + measuring cups, spoons, tractors, & a funnel = nearly an hour of fun! 

 

 

 

 

See all those peas on the floor? 

I'm pretty sure there are still a few many of them hiding on our kitchen floor.  ;)

Emma Victoria: 3 Months

Happy 3 Months, Emma!

What a month we've had!  We have spent a lot of time at Dr. Dalton's office and Cook Children's downtown.  Emma has continued to have a deep cough, and after testing for RSV & whopping cough (both negative) and having a chest x-ray done (clear), Dr. Dalton referred us to a pulmonologist downtown. 

Through all our appointments, we've discovered...

• Emma has silent reflux.  On May 1, she had a sonogram at Cook Children's which showed that she was refluxing significantly--in just the 5 minutes that they monitored, she had five episodes.  Poor baby!  But, we had no idea since she never spits up.  Once we explained her symptoms to the pulmonologist, he said his initial thought was that she had silent reflux, and the sonogram showed that he was exactly right!
• Emma also aspirates, meaning a small amount of her milk goes into her airway and her lungs.  On May 9, we had a swallow study.  Basically, I fed her several bottles under moving x-ray with different levels of flow and different consistencies of milk to see how she swallows.  The only time she didn't aspirate was when she had thickened milk.  So, we now use a thickener in all her bottles to help her slow down her swallowing, which allows her to swallow correctly and not aspirate.   I was really sad to find out that she was aspirating--especially when the speech pathologist told us that she'd likely been doing it since birth.  We are so thankful that her worst symptom was a cough--even though it was a horrible cough, she could have been so much more sick.  And, Emma is doing great on the thickener--so great that she gained 10 ounces in just the last week on it!  (Good-bye, newborn clothes!) 

Because of these things, Emma now sleeps on a slinged wedge.

But, I don't really think she minds at all, because this is the smile I see each morning!

Emma has been sleeping in her own room for the past 2 weeks.  She seemed so little to move out of her room, but then I remembered that we moved Isaac into his own room when he was only 6 weeks.  As of this week, Emma has dropped her late night feeding, so now we do her last feeding around 8 p.m.  It seems so surreal that both Emma and Isaac go to bed at the same time!  She usually wakes up around 6:45 or 7, which gives us a good hour of "girl time" before Isaac wakes up at 8.  :)

Emma also had an EEG on May 15 due to some random, scary movements she had several days previous.  As soon as I told Dr. Dalton about them, he knew exactly what I was describing and said that they can indicate a type of seizure that can be very serious.  Poor Dr. Dalton--he must think I'm the most weepy mom alive!  It just completely caught me off guard to hear that my baby girl had to have an EEG.  Thankfully, David was able to go with me.  It definitely wasn't fun to see Emma like this, and I only took this photo to remember everything God carried us through this month... 

...but we are **so thankful** that Emma's EEG came back perfectly normal! 

Thank you, Jesus, for this healthy, happy baby girl!

A few more pictures from this month...

This is my favorite way to "carry" Emma--I love having Emma so close in my Moby wrap! 
My friend Shari took this picture of Emma & me with Amber and her little girl Liv at BSF.  :)

Isaac loves to "show" Emma how her toys work.  :)

And, we've been doing lots of tummy time this month!

I wish you could hear the squeals and coos that this sweet girl is making all the time now...she's such a delight!

Emma Victoria, we love you!



My Mother's Day~2012

I woke up on Sunday morning to the best cup of coffee (David knows what I love the most!)...

and this sweet gift on Emma's wrist! 

It was an "Emma" charm for my Vintage Pearl necklace! 

Emma's adorable smile was a perfect way to start Mother's Day!

We attended the first service at Keystone, and then Isaac stayed while David served in Little Campers.  During that time, Emma and I went over to Watermere to visit my Grandma Joan.

She loves snuggling and singing with Emma!

That evening, we went up to Roanoke and had supper at The Twisted Root--I love their root beer!

(I couldn't believe how big Isaac looks in this picture!  Where is my little boy?!?!)

Isaac was so excited when the train passed by...

After supper, we went to a little park in Roanoke.  Isaac rode his bike around, and we stopped at the playground.  The park also had a little area filled with exercise equipment.  Isaac wanted me to lay down on the sit-up bench...and then this is what he did! 

Haha--he was pretending to give me an adjustment!  His imagination never fails to surprise me!

And, since we now have four chiropractors in our family, I'm sure one of them can critique Isaac's technique.  :)

Remembering how hard Mother's Day was for me not that long ago made this Mother's Day especially sweet.  I am so thankful for these two sweethearts!

Emma's Backstory

With Mother's Day coming up this Sunday, I wanted to take a few moments to write "Emma's Backstory"--or, at least, what I am calling her backstory!  There are some more personal details in this, but I believe that they show how God is always working, even (and especially) when we can't see His plan.

Last summer, after losing both babies' adoptions, I had surgery that we hoped would help us conceive.  My doctor was very optimistic about the results and told us that, statistically, the highest chance of conception after a surgery like mine was in the first 6 months.  For the first two months after the surgery, we did unmedicated IUIs.  The sadness I felt in December, which was the sixth month after my surgery, was so heavy.  Often, our infertility is still very hard for me, and we had been very hopeful that this surgery may have given us an opportunity to grow our family through pregnancy. 

After New Year's, David & I began praying more earnestly about how God would have us grow our family.  At that point, we had been waiting with Adoption Network for exactly a year.   Adoption Network didn't have statistics on what the average wait for consecutive adoptions is, but they did tell us that it would be significantly longer than their average wait time of 4 months for first adoptions.  In January, we called our adoption counselor and asked her what we could do to possibly get a match more quickly.  She offered several solutions.  We talked and prayed through them--some were easy, obvious choices to us and others were difficult.  We ended up changing a few things on our profile at Adoption Network, but we also prayed that God would show us other ways that we could grow our family, since we had no idea when we'd receive a match from Adoption Network.

In January, a lady at my parent's church contacted my mom about two brothers, ages 3 & 5, who were just being released from the foster system and were available for adoption.  This lady knew our story and wondered if we might be interested in adopting them.  My mom wisely talked to David about this situation without telling me about it--she wanted Dave to handle this how he best thought.  One night, I was telling David all about my friend Amanda's adoption of Brody from Ukraine.  Up until that time, we had never envisioned ourselves adopting an older child or sibling group.  Dave interrupted my story about Brody and asked if I had talked to my mom.  All of a sudden, I knew that he was about to say something BIG....he started to tell me about these two boys and I just started sobbing.  We talked about this possibility for a long time that night and both loved the idea!

The next morning, David called the boys' case worker.  We thought we would be eligible to apply for adoption of these boys since our home study was current.  The caseworker explained that we needed to be licensed as foster parents to adopt from the foster system.  We asked if there was any way we could complete the 30 hours of training necessary to be licensed.  The case worker was very sweet and said that we could try, but that the boys would likely be placed by the time we could realistically finish the 30 hours.

Even though we were disappointed that these brothers were out of reach for us, we wondered if this was God's way of opening our hearts to adopting a sibling group out of the foster system.  We contacted two local agencies that work with children in the foster system and began praying specifically about this option.

At the same time, we felt like we should go back to our fertility doctor.  We hadn't been back to see him since the winter of 2008/2009, but we wanted to discuss the surgery I'd had last summer and see what he thought of our options.  Given my age and several other variables, he gave us a great percentage for a successful IVF, which is one fertility option we hadn't previously done.  We had never before felt that God was leading us to do an IVF cycle; but, after meeting with our fertility doctor, we began to feel more open to it.  We'd always had some ethical questions about IVF, so we ordered this book.  David and I both read it in a weekend and together felt like we could do an IVF cycle that would not compromise our beliefs.

We prayed and prayed...God, should we begin training to be foster parents?  God, should we pursue IVF?  Both seemed hard, for very different reasons, and we knew that we couldn't move ahead with either one until God gave us both direction. 

A verse that I clung to and prayed over many days during this time was "Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, 'This is the way; walk in it.' " (Isaiah 30:21).  I can't explain how sad, and at times, frustrated, I was that God wasn't answering our prayer.  I felt like I was slowly surrendering my idea of what my family would look like and how it would grow...both David and I were ready, with open hearts, to move to the right or to the left with whatever God showed us.  But, we didn't feel like God was showing us anything.  Night after night, we'd talk about this...and all either of us could say was, "I just sense that God is saying 'wait'." 

Of course, we had no idea that a beautiful birthmother, L, was deciding to place her baby for adoption.  At one of L's prenatal appointments, she talked about her adoption plan with her OB.  L's doctor told her that his daughter and son-in-law were infertile & asked if she would consider placing her baby girl with them.  L was very open to this, since she really respected her doctor and later told me she would loved the idea of placing her daughter with this couple.  The OB told L that he would bring his daughter's adoption profile to the office with him the next day and that she should call his nurse to get it.  L called her OB's nurse the next day and explained the situation.  Apparently the nurse looked everywhere and couldn't find the paperwork that was supposed to be there.  At her next appointment, L's OB asked if she had changed her mind on adoption.  She said no, and then he asked why she had never called to pick up his daughter's profile.  L told him that she had, and that the nurse had said couldn't find it.  He said it had been sitting on the nurse's desk ever since that morning.  In the meantime, L had found Adoption Network in the yellow pages.  She called and said that her only specification was for her daughter to be raised in a Christian family.  Adoption Network has many Christian families waiting for babies, but through God's providence, our profile was one of only six that they sent to L.  She chose us...and you know the rest of the story.

I am confident that the months we spent waiting were not wasted.  They definitely weren't what I envisioned, and there were many days that I cried for the babies whose adoptions we lost and cried that my surgery didn't have the result we'd hoped for...but God has used that time to show me that He will show David and I the way to walk--even when we have no idea where He is leading us.  We were convinced God was going to show us to begin training to adopt from the foster system or pursue IVF, but He didn't.  However, these opportunities were not wasted, and we believe God may use either of these options to grow our family in the future.  But for today, my heart is full with the realization that my God is faithful!  Even when we couldn't see an answer, He was still working.  And, His answer was beautiful!

On this Mother's Day weekend, I echo the words of Psalm 113:9:

"He settles the childless woman in her home,

as a happy mother of children.

Praise the Lord!"

"What God wants for you is never less than anything you have wanted.

You'll never come up short. And when He answers, in His time and in His way,

it will be richer, deeper, and far more meaningful."

~Anne Graham Lotz

What's in a Name: Emma Victoria

Emma Victoria's name has such a beautiful story behind it that combines the love of her birth family and her adoptive family.

Long before we even thought about growing our family, David and I had always loved the name Isaac and hoped to someday name a son by that name.  Though there were several girl names that we both liked, neither of us had our heart set on a girl's name in the same way as we did with the name Isaac.  If you know me at all, you know that I absolutely love names.  No joke--I had three copies of baby name books when I was in junior high and would pour over them as I imagined naming my future children!  To not have a girl's name solidified really slightly stressed me out...especially when we received such a short match for a baby girl!  I refused to let myself get too stressed out about it, though...because I was so beyond thrilled to have a baby girl on the way! 

I flew to Minnesota the day after we received the call for Emma's match, and, while I was there, David and I talked on and off about names.  Last year, when we were expecting to adopt a baby girl, we had chosen a name.  We still loved that name, along with one other one, so we prayed about those two names and trusted that God would show us which name should be hers.

Three days before Emma was born, I had my first phone call with L, Emma's birthmom.  During this call, L asked if we would consider naming her baby girl Emma Jo.  Emma was a name that we loved in the sense that it is Swedish and classic, just as the other two names that we were considering were.  Plus, Emma has a traditional spelling, which is important to me as a former teacher.  :)



By the time we arrived at the hospital, David and I had narrowed down our list to one of our original names and Emma.  I had always been a little nervous of waiting to name a baby after birth.  I love to have everything planned out, and I never imagined that I'd wait to name a baby until I saw him or her.  But, the first time I saw our beautiful baby girl in the hospital, I just knew she was an Emma. 

My great-grandmother's name was Emma Victoria, and it is from her and my other great-grandmother, Clara Victoria, that I get my middle name, since I am Bethany Victoria. Of course, I never met my Great-Grandmother Emma or Clara, but I love that Emma's name is tied to both my family and her birth family. As if that wasn't enough family history in Emma's name, my sister's name is Emily, and I think it's special that Emma's name has a tie to Emily.

Emma with her aunt Emily

We still weren't completely sure what Emma's middle name should be--I wanted to pass down my middle name to my daughter, but we also wanted to honor Emma's birth mother.  On the afternoon Emma was born, L and I were talking in her hospital room.  I told L what my middle name was and was starting to say that we'd love to name her Emma Victoria.  Before I could finish my sentence, though, L said, "Why don't you name her Emma Victoria?"  It was so wonderful to have L's blessing on the name Emma Victoria, because we really wanted to honor her desires for her daughter but also loved Victoria as a middle name.  On Emma's original birth certificate, her name is Emma Jo, and on her second birth certificate, her name is Emma Victoria. 

Emma with her beautiful birth mother!

We are so glad she suggested the name Emma for this sweet baby girl!!

We were privileged to spend so much time with Emma's birth family in the hospital.

 This is Emma with her H, her birth grandma. 

One of my strongest memories from our time in the hospital is when H shared the meaning of Emma's name and why she especially loved it so much.  Emma means "complete" and "whole."  Hearing the meaning of Emma's name completely solidified for me that God meant for this baby girl to be Emma!  David & I were praying so intently about the other names, but God already knew that this beautiful baby girl would be Emma Victoria--complete, whole, & victorious!

While we were in Missouri, Isaac spent some time with our friends Corrie & Mark.  Corrie wrote this sign and had Isaac color it for his baby sister.  There's such a big blank spot after the word "family" because we hadn't yet announced Emma's name.  :)  In a way, that just feels like yesterday, and other times I feel like Emma's always been in our family...either way, we couldn't be more thankful to have this beautiful baby girl in our family! 

Emma Victoria, you are loved!

The Countdown Begins!!

A little over a month ago, my sister, Emily, and Caleb got engaged!  I love this picture of them right after Caleb proposed!  We are SO excited that they are getting married over Labor Day weekend--that's just 4 months from TODAY!  :)

Caleb and Emily flew down to Texas last Wednesday!  We loved spending time with them!

Isaac really, really likes Caleb.  (Of course, he really likes his Aunt Em-Em, too!)  He wouldn't stop asking Caleb to wrestle and do horsey rides with him.  Here's a picture of one of the few calm moments from Caleb and Emily's visit where Isaac wasn't jumping up, around, and on Caleb.  :)

(And, I have to say that Isaac pronounces "Caleb" so adorably--the "c" sound is a little tricky right now, so it ends up sounding more like "Ta-web.")  :)

On Thursday, my friend Corrie graciously watched Isaac for over ten hours so that we could go wedding shopping over in Dallas!  It was such a fun day!

And, what's a trip to Dallas without a stop at Sprinkles?  ;) 

We also had several fun dinners with our whole family! 

We love you, Caleb and Emily, and can't wait for your big day!!

Wordless Wednesday